| Sir Mordred the Black Knight aka DJ Floorbat's Journal |
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Sir Mordred the Black Knight aka DJ Floorbat
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| ????? |
[16 Mar 2007|01:14pm] |
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Something has moved in to my HQ. It's been here for almost two weeks.
Unauthorized!
Unacceptable!
Heads will roll!
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| BLAST!! |
[09 Mar 2005|01:29pm] |
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mood |
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 angry |
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Again the mailman did not bring me MY TANK!!!
He dies on the morrow.
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| She's not allowed to leave |
[10 May 2004|01:46pm] |
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mood |
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 sad |
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If I keep sitting on mom's lap, she'll never be able to leave. I don't want her to go and leave with these incompetent minions.
::sulk::
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| Excellent! |
[25 Jan 2004|04:23pm] |
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mood |
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grumpy |
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| Come my minions - I have need of you |
[07 Jan 2004|07:18am] |
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mood |
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 predatory |
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Now, it is time for the masterplan of the Mord to be laid into action. Minions, you must gather round for your assignments. Bring me steaky goodness! And mice! Many, many mice to command. My message must be carried far and wide.
The rule of men is is over. Now comes the REIGN OF THE MORD!!!
Mwa Ha Ha
MY PAW SHALL RULE THEM ALL!!!
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| Cower in your shade, h00m0ns |
[14 Aug 2003|07:38pm] |
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mood |
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 excited |
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My plan worked perfectly. All power to the Eastern Seaboard. Taken Down! Watch as the silly humans run around trying to find water and shade. All the while my minions are in action planning my rise to power. Who do you think owns all the ice cream trucks? And Icee machines? And the Polar Ice Company? ME ME ME!!!
The profits from this endeavor will fund my Persian army! Soon you all will feel the iron wrath of my furry paw on your neck! Submit while you have the chance!!
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| ATTENTION MINIONS |
[23 Jul 2003|07:16pm] |
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mood |
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 devious |
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In the very near future you will be receiving a visit from one of my mice messengers with instructions on your part in my plan for global domination. These brave rodents have been threatend with risked life and tail to bring you my commands. Obey them as you obey me. After they have delivered the message you may, of course, brutally slice them open and have them for breakfast. It's what I would do...
Long Live the Revolution!!
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| Democracy is of no use to me |
[09 Jul 2003|09:32am] |
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mood |
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bitchy |
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I cannot believe this silliniess on ![[info]](http://l-stat.livejournal.com/img/community.gif) pets_elite. As if I need a vote to be elite? Silly h00m0ns. My ancestors were ruling the Tigris and Euphrates whilst your ancestors were struggling to walk upright. I am of royal Persian blood. Silly humans. You think your little voting schemes mean anything?!?!
Just as soon as I break free of this interminable prison, the world will be bent to my rule. I am your overlord and your democracy means nothing to me! Very soon, you humans will be back where you belong: cleaning out the litter box and preparing me nice fish-y and steak-y goodness!!!
My spin-doctor says the above statement is not in keeping with my new 'benevolent despot' image. Please disregard. NOW GET BACK TO WORK. Ahem
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| Elite Pets |
[08 Jul 2003|08:56pm] |
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mood |
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annoyed |
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My silly h00m0n was chasing me around tonight with the damn camera. Wanted pictures of me for pets_elite. Yes. I am going to kill her in her sleep.
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| h00m0ns! |
[04 Jun 2003|09:44am] |
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mood |
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determined |
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It's sad that it has come to this, but I think I need a new set of minions. The old ones just aren't performing like they used to. Plus, my view of the city has been blocked for days and the Big Guy keeps hogging the internet. So, without further ado:
SSDP (Single, Smoke, Despotic, Persian) seeks subservient eager home. Your bed and tub must be larger and accomodating. No shower-only homes. MUST have view of city and high-speed access. Pet-free homes only, no other dogs or cats allowed. Prefer a willingness to wake on my every whim and indulge my beck and call. NO VEGETARIANS. I must have steak-y goodness. I prefer my water fresh, so I will need an ongoing supply of bottled water. Preferrably, Evian. A bonus if you speak and understand Farsi. Respond to the address listed on my user info page. You should have read and understand Che Guevara, Marx, Machiavelli, and other enlightened leaders
The chosen minion(s) will be honored to be part of my evil plan for world domination.
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| Attention h00m0n underlings |
[04 May 2003|03:18pm] |
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mood |
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 bored |
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As part of my 'kinder and gentler' image makeover, you may now refer to me as your 'benevolent despot' rather than your 'evil dictator'. We will also celebrate my birthday with cake and ice cream rather than the usual executions.
NOW GET BACK TO WORK!!!
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| Update on Operation Global Takeover |
[09 Apr 2003|10:50am] |
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mood |
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devious |
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It seems my plans to get the weather systems under my control have been a great success!! SNOW!! IN APRIL!!
However, Mom did manage to trick me into being shaved at the groomer. That one is first against the wall (the groomer - not mom). I am _not_ amused. Something's up. I can tell. Mom's been reading travel books again and shopping more than usual. Seems she's going to a place called Las Vegas. I read up on it and it seems like a _perfect_ place for my ev0l plans.
Vegas needs an ev0l persian dictator. Yes, it does. In the meantime, I continue to taunt Anime and make Bob's life a living hell. My operatives in Iran are implementing my strategy there. Soon the entire world will FEEL MY WRATH!!
*lick*
back to grooming
*lick*
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| Summoning my minions |
[31 Dec 2002|09:49am] |
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mood |
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devious |
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Mom is VERY stressed right now. She's not sleeping well. Thus, since I sleep on her head, *I* am not sleeping well. She has asked me to summon my dark minions from Mordor to assist her in her evil plans. This I have done.
*looks out window at City*
*sticks tongue out*
*meows*
HEAR ME MY FURRY MINIONS! SIR MORDRED THE DARK KNIGHT HAS NEED OF YOUR SERVICES! THE SHADOW PERSIAN COMMANDS YOU!
Excellent. Everything is at hand.
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| Harrrumph! |
[09 Dec 2002|12:16pm] |
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mood |
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lonely |
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It's too cold out for me to make my escape.
BLAST!
I really need to get my proper coat back. Hiding under the covers is not becoming. I think Mom and the Big Guy are trying to keep me here by shaving me. Furthermore, if they stick that damn camera in my face just ONE more time. Well..... it won't be pretty folks.
I've been thinking lately that it might be time for me to finally settle down and get a companion. One worthy of my Persian Heritage. I took a look around and came up with some startling revelations. I cannot BELIEVE I looked anything like this. Ever. That's more like it.
MMMMMMMMMMMMMMEEEEEEEEEEEEEOW!
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| *ahem* |
[06 Dec 2002|03:23pm] |
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This whole 'lack of fur in Winter' thing is NOT funny. I want my coat back and I want it NOW
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